• 10- ʏ/ɴ •

I slide onto the rooftop with a mix of curiosity and hesitation, trying not to feel like I'm intruding.

JUNGKOOK is standing by the edge, staring at the city like it's some grand mystery that he's just figured out.

He doesn't move, doesn't flinch when I step closer. His shoulders are tight, like he's carrying the weight of the world on them, and I can't help but wonder why he's acting like this. It's the kind of vibe I know I'm not supposed to care about, but here we are.

"You planning to jump or just staring down at your existential crisis?" I ask, raising an eyebrow, just trying to break the silence.

JUNGKOOK doesn't even blink, his eyes glued to the city like there's a secret he's trying to decipher. "What's it to you?"

I may not have known JUNGKOOK for long, but I've been around long enough to pick up on the signs. And right now, everything about him screams that he's not okay.

His usual sharp edges are dull, his posture too tense, like he's holding himself together by sheer force of will. And there's something else-something that's too subtle to put a finger on, but it's there, hanging in the air between us.

I shrug, leaning against the wall, crossing my arms. "Just checking if I need to start a GoFundMe for your therapy or if you're just one bad day away from a full meltdown."

He finally glances at me, his usual sharp, dismissive look settling into place. "Keep talking, and I might just push you off the fucking roof."

"Yeah, you'll definitely do that," I retort, giving him a playful smirk. "Big tough guy, threatening to push me while you're over there smoking your life away. Real intimidating."

He takes a long drag of his cigarette, eyes narrowing as he exhales. "I don't need to be intimidating. Just need to be left alone."

I roll my eyes. "Oh, that's cute. You're like a grumpy cat. Growling at everyone but secretly just wanting some attention."

He scoffs, flicking the ash off his cigarette. "I can't even begin to explain how little I care about your cat analogies."

"Of course you can't," I shoot back, sarcastic. "You can barely handle a conversation, let alone a metaphor."

Silence ensues. I can't force him to talk, but I can be here, quietly, without pushing too hard.

But quiet is not my strongest suit so I try again.

"What's up with you today?" I ask again, a little more direct, and a little soft. "You've been... off. More than usual, I mean."

His eyes flick to me for a split second, but he doesn't say anything.

He's clearly debating whether to respond or not. Probably a sarcastic response.

I'm not going to push him to talk, but I want to let him know I'm here if he wants to.

"Look, I'm not expecting you to spill your guts or anything," I say, trying to keep my voice gentle, "but if you want to talk, I'd love to hear it. You don't have to do this whole yulnerable alone thing y'know?I can share stuff too, if that makes it easier."

I take a deep breath and continue.

"I don't know, it's like when you keep everything to yourself, it just piles up, you know? But when you share it, even just a little, it's like... something lifts. You don't feel so heavy, like there's less weight on your shoulders. Like, yeah, life still sucks sometimes, but having someone else to like, carry a tiny bit of it? It makes it all feel a little bit more bearable. I don't know, maybe I'm rambling, but, I think that's why people need other people. We're not meant to do everything alone."

I watch him for a moment, hoping he'll say something, anything.

But instead, he just turns his head slowly toward me, and his eyes lock onto mine -intense, like they could pierce straight through me if I let them.

My chest tightens, and my heart stumbles over itself.

And then he raises an eyebrow, his gaze not leaving mine. "Yeah?" he says, his voice low, like he's genuinely asking, but there's a subtle, almost smug tilt to his lips.

I blink, trying to regain my composure, but the way he's looking at me. I open my mouth, but my brain's too busy trying to catch up to form anything coherent.

"Yeah," I say, barely above a whisper, my cheeks flaming.

He just nods, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly as if he's amused by the whole thing.

I can feel the blush creeping up my neck, and I quickly look away, trying to hide my face behind my hands. This is not happening.

JUNGKOOK stands there for a moment, the corner of his mouth still twitching as he looks me over. Then, with a casual glance toward the skyline, he mutters, "I'm fine."

I let out a huff, unable to hold back my frustration. "I spoke all that for nothing, then," I say, the words coming out a bit sharper than I intended.

He doesn't respond, his attention back on the city, but I can tell he's still listening. I can always tell when he's tuned in, even when he acts like he's not.

I try to force a laugh, but it comes out weak. "So, uh, how many of those have you had?" I ask, pointing to the cigarette between his fingers.

He glances at the cigarette and then flicks his eyes back to the skyline without missing a beat. "More than I should have."

I raise an eyebrow, noticing the way his lips twitch into something between a smirk and a frown. "Uh-huh," I murmur, my gaze narrowing. "You're avoiding the question."

"Maybe," he says, his voice low and flat, but it's like the weight of his words has shifted.

His jawline is set, his hair tousled in that effortlessly messy way that makes me want to run my fingers through it like I did this morning, but I settle for just staring. They were super soft, surprisingly so.

I clear my throat, still trying to collect myself after the way his gaze had shifted things between us. But it's now or never, so I play the card.

"You owe me an explanation," I say, my tone teasing but not unkind. "After you -y'know-being high and grabbing me, manhandling me, and cuddling me like I'm your teddy bear or something. What was that about?"

JUNGKOOK stiffens, his gaze snapping to me with a flash of surprise. His cheeks flush a little, and I see the usual confident façade crack just for a second.

Omg, he's blushing.

He rubs the back of his neck, glancing away as if he's looking for a way to hide from this conversation. "Ugh," he mutters, clearly embarrassed. "I'm not gonna get high around you again."

I can't help myself. I burst out laughing, unable to hold it in. "Aww, the cuddlebug is apologizing to silly ol' me?" I tease, my grin spreading wider as I watch him squirm.

JUNGKOOK's jaw tightens, and he shoots me a look that's sharp enough to silence the laugh bubbling up in my chest.

Okay, okay. Fine. I get it.

I raise my hands in mock surrender, though I can't hide the smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. "Alright, alright. No more teasing. I'll stop."

"It's not a big deal," he mutters, voice flat but sharp, like he's trying to downplay it all, but it comes out rough. His eyes are still locked on the skyline, but his jaw clenches like it's all simmering underneath. "Responsibilities, expectations... the usual crap. You get used to it."

I wait, not pushing, just letting him have space. But at the same time, I want to hear more. I want to know everything.

"Nothing you do is ever enough, you know? You make your own decisions? Doesn't matter. You're just a puppet on a string. You either play their game, or you don't play at all. Simple as that."

I can feel the bitterness in his tone, but it's like he's shrugging it off.

"It's exhausting," he continues, his voice cutting through the air with that edge, like he's trying to make it clear he doesn't care. "But who fucking cares, right? Just go along with it. Keep the head down. The less you fight back, the easier it is."

He shrugs.

JUNGKOOK takes a step back, hand reaching for another cigarette, but before he can light it, I gently place my hand over his, warm against his cold skin.

His fingers stiffen for a moment, but he doesn't pull away. The weight of the moment hangs between us, the silence deepening in a way I didn't expect.

"Thank you for telling me all that," I say, my voice soft, the sincerity threading through my words. I feel his gaze flicker to me, the tension in his shoulders easing just slightly, but he doesn't say anything. I think he knows what I mean.

I take a slow breath, then try to push the heavy atmosphere away by offering something lighter.

"So, uh..." I start, my hand lingering on his as I offer a tentative smile. "Pizza? I'm starving."

JUNGKOOK's gaze softens a bit, but just a little. I can tell he's not entirely closed off, but that's as much as I'm going to get for now.

But then I try to change the subject, and, of course, it's the perfect opportunity for him to slip back into his usual, ridiculous self. He removes his hand.

"Pizza?" He says it like I just suggested we swim through a lake of broken glass. "Really? You expect me to eat with you? Of all people?"

I can't help but roll my eyes, feeling a little sting at the last part.

"What's wrong with me? You don't like pizza now?" I shoot back, trying to keep my cool, but there's a little bite to my voice. "I'm just saying, we've been talking for ages, and I'm starving. What's wrong with some cheesy comfort food?"

"I thought you were just 'fine. You know, according to your whole 'life's better when you talk about things' thing." He throws air quotes around 'life's better! "Didn't realize your stomach had deep philosophical needs."

"Nice, real mature, JUNGKOOK," I squint at him, the sarcasm coming easily but a little softer than usual.

I try to keep the sarcasm going, but there's a crack in it. "Oh, come on. It's just pizza. Not like I'm asking you to do something life-changing here."

JUNGKOOK looks at me like I just suggested we go jump off a cliff together.

"No," he says, his voice still laced with that condescending edge, but there's something underneath it.

I can't put my finger on it, but I swear he's not as annoyed as he's trying to sound.

I fold my arms, a little more defensively now, trying not to let my disappointment show. I swallow the lump in my throat, looking away. "Right. Okay. I guess I'll just eat my pizza alone, then. No big deal."

I start walking away, my shoulders slumping more than I intend. It's stupid, really-acting like I care if he joins me or not.

However, just as I take a few step

s, I hear his voice again, softer, almost like he's not sure whether he should say anything.

"Shut up," he sighs. "Let me just grab my jacket."